All week I thought about all of the quiet things I could capture throughout my house. Kids sleeping after they ran their mouth all day long, non-stop, never stopping to breathe until their head hit the pillow. Do you have a kid like that? I do. I also thought about capturing the slightly breezy trees outside in the evening the other night, because they were whistling oh so quietly. As I walked around, I looked at things here and there, and thought, "yeah, that's pretty quiet."
But then it was time to leave for my Wednesday meeting, and it hit me. This is my new quiet.
My head is quiet. My head no longer has the voice inside that repeatedly says over and over that I am not doing it right. Or I am not good enough. Or I should've done it better or paid more attention or been a better example. That voice has been silenced, and it's all because I stopped drinking. Alcohol created that voice. A long time ago, now that I think about it, because I didn't always have this voice. I used to be a carefree kid and a lighthearted teenager, who was ok with both my faults and highest selling points.
Somewhere along the line, the drinks poured in and the voices crept in. And it all made me insecure and anxious inside. Except I didn't know it, until I figured out and removed the culprit.
And now it's all clear to me. And it's quiet.
Except for that 6 year old who doesn't stop talking. :) But I'll take his chatter anyday.